It is amazing how fast children learn these days. Daily, they add to what they know from what they see, hear, or read; it’s just amazing the magnitude of influence around their world; television, books, magazines, internet, social networks, peer influence e.t.c. Now whilst this is good, it’s also necessary to exercise a bit of caution.
More so children are naturally very curious, making it look like they set out to explore the world and make discoveries. Sometimes, your child probably knows a bit more than you think. I particularly feel it is very important to answer their questions as much as possible, even if it is flowing in like a torrent, rather than just shutting them up. Try to be their very first teacher and a reliable one at that, who will always provide correct information, because the truth is; what you refuse to say, they will definitely learn elsewhere, and who knows what version they now get to know and hold on to at the end of the day?
Sometimes, some very awkward questions just hit you suddenly. Believe me; it has happened to me many times. I think sometimes we perhaps wrongly believe they are a little too young to know certain things and we are not prepared at that time to explain to them. My son was barely 9 and he asked, mummy what are sanitary towels used for? In my old fashioned thinking, I thought I need not explain in details, as first he is a boy and not so affected by it and next it is too early for him to bother about those details. So I said well it’s more like a panty liner. Okay mummy, he said and went off his way. A few months down the line, he came back and said, mummy we learnt about the reproductive cycle today in school and I found out sanitary towels are used for a lot more than you mentioned. Really? I said and I tried making one or two belated statements on the topic.
Months after again he came back with a new word, mummy what are condoms used for? Now I have learnt my lesson, so I went ‘those are used by adults .... and I just tried making one or two descent statements also finding out where he picked the word from.
I remember whilst growing up, what mothers commonly said to their daughters once she is starting her period was ‘look now you are fully mature and you can get pregnant if you move close to any man’. Now in our naive thinking, we thought even sharing a seat in school with a boy might be an issue.
Well, what you refuse to say, your child will end up learning anyway. Seize the opportunity to be your child’s very first teacher.
Prayer point: O Lord, help me to be a good teacher to my child, help me to establish the right truths in his/her heart that will guide him/her as he/she grows. Amen.
‘Train a child in the way he should go, when he grows up he will not depart from it’ Proverbs 22:6
You said something very key here.."Be your child's first teacher". We should not shy away from these matters because like you rightly pointed out, they will find out anyway but maybe the crooked version.
ReplyDeleteThe world we are in today is changing really fast and one way be can be ahead is to open our arms every time the children come with mind puzzling questions, sit them down and yes, tell them the things they need to know.
God help us.
Amen and Amen, may God help us in Jesus name. And you are perfectly right, the mother & child affinity increases where the mum makes herself approachable to her child and makes the effort to answer her child's questions. The child begins to build more trust in her/his mum and will more likely come to mummy if she/he needs to check on anything. Moreso, this is a door into your child's world, it actually let out a glimpse of what your child is going through.
ReplyDeleteWell said and very true. As a mother of three (18,15 and 15) i can add that it builds up the trust, bond and closeness. If that closeness is there, they know where to run to when things are not clear to them. They do tend to pick up a lot as they grow and as you rightly said we should make the time to sit them down and answer their curiosity.
ReplyDeleteMay God help us as we aim to be the best we can for our children.
Yes, the child will always trust that he can get the correct answers from asking mummy (or daddy as the case may be), and will always want to come to mummy to clarify issues. This should bring that 'closeness' and hopefully will make the child also want to confide in his/her mum on whatever issues bothering him/her.
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